Dealing with out of control kids can take away the fun out of parenting. It is not an enjoyable experience, but it is one you would have to handle with care. If not handled rightly, you could end up raising a rebellious kid.
Out of control kids can be of any age, but the attributes are the same. They have tantrums, act out and may even go as far as engaging in fights with you or their siblings. In other words, they are the fruits that fell far from the tree.
If you are having troubles with one or more out of control kids, you are not alone. There are million of parents and caregivers globally faced with the same challenge.
In this article, we would critically analyze the issue and offer practical solutions to remedy the situation. Yes, out of control kids can be rehabilitated, and we would discuss how.
Out of Control Kids – How to Deal With Out of Control Child
Signs Your Child is Out of Control
Yes, some signs can indicate that your child is out of control. On may occasions – and sadly so, many parents and caregivers ignore the early signs.
When ignored, out of control kids often grow up to become irresponsible adults. Below, we have highlighted the signs that indicate that your child is out of control. Let us check it out together.
7 Signs to Identify Out of Control Kids
1. Poor Emotional Management
If you notice that your child is having difficulties handling his/her emotions, chances are that you have an out of control kid in your hands. It is not abnormal for kids to be out of control, but when it is a habit, then there is cause for concern.
Out of control kids can not control their anger. They are also often frustrated and disappointed, which is a result of an underlying emotional problem.
2. Struggles in School and Academic Work
When you notice that your child is struggling with academic work or school, there is a problem. Naturally, kids love education, so when the reverse is the case, it means there is a learning or behaviour disorder.
Other warning signs that should not be ignored include engaging in fights or getting punished for bad behavior. Also, when the child has trouble concentrating on academics or given tasks, it is a sign.
Getting sent out of class, getting into fights at recess, and having difficulty staying on task are all potential warning signs.
3. Bad Impulse Control and Behavior
When a child has bad impulse control, you would notice that they are overly aggressive. When you find out that your child is aggressive and rude to peers, teachers, and neighbors, take note.
Such an attitude is a major red flag and it indicates that the child needs help just like other out of control kids.
When not handled, bad impulse control can lead to a child’s inability to develop his/her skills.
4. Abnormal Sexualized Behavior
When a child is engaging in sexual behaviors that are not appropriate for development, it is a warning sign. It is fine if your child asks harmless questions about the opposite sex or reproduction.
But when you notice certain sexualized behaviors, you need to take action. Sexualized behavior should never be tolerated at any time, no matter the age of the child.
5. Does Not Respond to Discipline
Kids will always make mistakes. On many occasions, they will make the same mistake on more than one occasion. But when you notice that despite all your discipline measures, the child is making the same mistake, it is a red flag.
It is natural for a child to adjust to disciplinary measures. It is a huge indicator that your child is out of control if he or she does not respond to discipline.
6. Poor Social Interactions
When you notice that your child has trouble with social interactions, it is a red flag. It means that his or her behavior is clashing with her ability to relate.
It is normal for kids to engage in struggles and small fights. But when a child’s behavior affects his or her ability to make friends, then it is wrong. It is natural for kids to want to make new friends.
If you notice that your kid does not want to make friends and cannot maintain friendships, it is a red flag. Chances are that the child is an out of control kid.
7. Inflicting Self Injury
No matter the age, anyone that inflicts self-injury has a big problem. If you notice that your kid bangs his head on the wall when angry or inflicts cuts, take caution.
Not only is this a behavior of out of control kids, but it is also a sign that the child needs urgent professional attention. Another red flag is if your child talks about suicide. Even if it was a joke, you should take it seriously.
How to Deal With Out of Control Child
There is always a solution for everything and ways to handle every challenge. You need to let your children see the leader in you and understand that there are limits to actions.
Also, letting them know that there are boundaries and consequences to their actions goes a long way. Below we have highlighted the best ways to handle out of control kids for optimal results.
When you do things the right way, you are bound to see changes and improvements. Check out these strategies to help handle out of control kids the right way.
How to Handle Out Of Control Kids – 10 Ways to Handle Out of Control Kids
1. Create a Structure
As a parent or caregiver, you need to create a structure to organize the child’s life. The structure will help to identify time for play, food, assignment, sleep, etc.
You should discuss the structure with your family and have it written down. This will help to organize their lives.
2. Assign Household Chores
No matter the age of your child, ensure that they take responsibility. Household chores help to install discipline and responsibility in children.
Make sure that you assign an age-appropriate household chore for kids. It is a good way to handle out of control kids.
3. Make Clear Household Rules
Again, make sure that household rules are written down, discussed, and understood. The rules may be simple basics like ”always say please” and “thank you.” These household rules will reflect on your kids in and outside the home.
4. Speak Positively to Your Kids
Always use positive language to and around your kids. A good way to do this is not to deprive them of what they want. Rather, use what they want as a reward for good behavior and hard work. Positivity gives kids a sense of belonging.
5. Give Instructions Effectively
Yes, there is a clear pattern to give instructions if you want it to be effective. Do ensure you have the child’s attention before giving instructions.
Secondly, you must ensure that you are speaking in a calm voice. Nobody likes to be shouted upon, no matter how old – or young. Lastly, ensure you give one instruction at a time.
6. Be Disciplined at all Times
When you set rules, be disciplined towards them. Also, you need to ensure that there are consequences for breaking certain rules.
Naturally, when a child knows there is a consequence to an action, the chances to commit them is low. You need to be disciplined and make sure that you follow up your rules with action.
7. Give Incentives for Good Work
Children love gifts and incentives – don’t we all do? One of the ways to handle out of control kids is by giving them incentives. What would you do if you know you will get an incentive for good work?
The interesting thing about out of control kids is that they may not be moved by consequences. But sometimes, the trick is in incentives.
8. Praise Good Work
You should always take out time to commend and praise your kids. Always appreciate their small efforts and attempts, and don’t stop referencing how useful it was.
When a child sees that you can’t stop talking about a good deed, they will want to continue – or do more. This works for me all the time, I am positive it will work for you too.
9. Have a Physical Reward System
It is not enough to just say thank you and pour out appreciation. You also need to give physical rewards. When a child sees a toy or game they got from something good they did, they would want more.
A good way to do this is to get the gifts in the house and inform them that they will get them for good behavior.
10. Reward Them With What They Like
Ask your children what they like and want – if you don’t know. Then it becomes easy because you will be actually rewarding their good behavior and hard work with what they want.
Trust me when I tell you that they will want more. So, that means your out of control kid will do more to become better.
My Child is Out of Control Where Can I Send Him in Texas
Many parents make costly mistakes when it comes to handling out of control kids. Some kids turn out even worse after they are sent to family members or religious homes.
The best place to send your out of control kid is one that can offer help, love, and support. The place should have professionals who can handle crisis intervention, counselling, and case management.
It also needs to have a proven track record of successful rehabilitation. If you live in Texas, then the good news is that you can take advantage of the National Health and Human Services Center in Texas.
You could also speak to a health professional for assistance.
Who Can I Call When My Child is Out of Control
If you notice that all your discipline measures are not yielding results, you may need to seek external help. But the question is, who can you call when your child is out of control? If they do not listen to you, who would they listen to, right?
Well, it doesn’t work that way. Handling out of control kids isn’t all about listening. You should seek professional help right away. A professional would be able to provide intervention, support, and skill that will help rehabilitate your kid.
Also, parenting and support groups can come in handy, especially when there is someone who has experience with out of control kids.